And let’s be real… no matter how hard I try to switch it up, the blog will always be my online diary. So amidst addressing your topics, sharing recipes and tips, etc. I will always just be blogging from the heart! That is what this blog has always been about.

Today I am writing about a topic that has been tugging on my heartstrings to address for a while… the intuitively plant-based lifestyle I have been following since January of this year.

I have been getting so many ( very VALID! ) questions from you guys about where the whole intuitively plant-based thing came from on my end. I very publicly went through a “breakup” with veganism, if you will, which you can read all about HERE if you haven’t, and also HERE ( the whoooole story & shebang! ) in my book.

After that public breakup, I see how it could seem a little confusing from your point of view to see me go back to a largely vegan diet. I want to share this post to break down the walls between us & try as best as I can to share where I am coming from… because if you had been with me for the whole journey ( which you kinda have if you’ve been reading the whole time, but I mean like REALLY with me every day / seeing the ins & outs of my health decline ) then it wouldn’t seem out of nowhere in the least.

I don’t really mind what anyone thinks of the switch I have made. I learned a long time ago that when you share your life on the Internet, an onslaught of opinions about your every single move will be made and shared with you ( often lashed out, but also often shared with grace and compassion ). The only thing I care about is expressing myself & sharing with you where I am coming from so it can hopefully help you find more clarity & wellness in your own life!

So let’s see here… without backing up TOO far, let me walk you back to last December when J & I spent two weeks in Bali.

My health was already a mess, but it got REAL BAD in Bali…

While that trip was epically fun, and our first huge trip together as a couple, to the most magical healing oasis of all time… it was also INCREDIBLY hard on my body and my health. It was the first time I had taken myself out of my day to day routine for that long, and while we were traveling it hit me hard that I WAS NOT WELL.

I felt very off. Nauseated, inflamed, bloated (massive understatement), puffy, ITCHY (head to toe rashes), out of whack hormones, emotional / moody, in pain with migraines and joint aches, VERY fatigued and lethargic, ten times my age (just no energy or zest whatsoever), horrible acne, scatter brained, and desperate for a change. All of this pain and sickness was also making me DEPRESSED, which is a terrible addition to the rest of it.

Jonathan was a trooper. He saw how happy the lifestyle & pace of Bali was making me, so he encouraged me to book a solo trip for April so that I could give myself space and time to HEAL.

Bali nights with my number one support system. Feeling like crap but very much in love… with him and the gorgeous oasis of Indonesia.

At the time we didn’t even know what I needed to heal from, but it was clear that healing needed to happen. I was not myself at all, whatsoever, not even close. At Nihiwatu, the most beautiful hotel in the WORLD on the island of Sumba outside of Bali, I sobbed and laid in bed with the worst migraine I have ever had in my life… spent an entire day inside after a morning hike + breakfast overlooking the ocean that should have been the most glorious / luxurious /enjoyable view I have ever experienced in my entire lifetime.

Instead, I was a mess. I had NO idea what I could eat / could not eat. I was paralyzed with pain and fear that what I put into my mouth would make my symptoms 100x worse. I was afraid to eat anything other than water or coffee, literally, because food was such a gamble. I was also trying to play the game of “I’m on vacation, I should be indulging!!” by eating the yummy gluten-free toast, eggs, bacon, desserts, etc. that Jonathan was eating with ease.

Every day culminated with me saying, “You have to help me,” to him. “You have to help me make sure I never eat eggs or gluten-free grains again. I can’t eat sugar. I don’t even think I should be drinking coffee. I am so f*cked up.”

“Make me take more magnesium at night. Make sure I am drinking 10x as much water as I am now. I need to find a doctor that can help me. I should have brought my digestive enzymes with me. I think my hormones are really, really, really bad from this IUD.”

( I had an IUD in for about 5 weeks before I got it removed — NOT a good idea to ever get it put in, in the first place. At least for my body and what I was already dealing with. )

In Bali, I was asked if I was pregnant at least three times. It was AWFUL. Here I am, being ridiculously careful about what I eat, working out every day, flaunting my cute new swim suits & resort wear, feeling sick as all hell but trying to keep a smile on my face and live in the moment, treating my boyfriend to a Balinese massage, and being asked post-massage by the spa owner if I am PREGNANT. What the f*ck?

Needless to say, I came back to the U.S. with a lot of questions, a lot of defeat, a lot of misery, and a whole new perspective of HEALTH and what I needed to do to get well.

Some initial takeaways from Bali…

In Bali I was able to get some perspective I very much needed about my life. I realized a few things: I was stressed BEYOND belief in my every day life, I had gut issues and some other health issues that were becoming absolutely debilitating, I NEEDED to get my IUD out, and my body was ridiculously intolerant to eggs, grains (even gluten-free), coffee, fish, and sugar.

So what did I do? Just about the only things I had control of: stop eating all of the above foods, and get the IUD taken out.

Since I already didn’t eat much red meat or pork, these new food eliminations brought me to a mostly vegan diet, which honestly… in my GUT OF ALL GUTS and CORE OF ALL CORES… seemed like the best freaking move of all time.

To be totally honest with you guys, I MISSED veganism. I missed it so, so, so much. I didn’t miss the labeling or the eating disorder I once had or the restriction I experienced when I used food to control my life, but I missed the healing properties of plants and the simplicity of a plant-based diet. I missed how GOOD I felt once upon a time eating that way. I missed the pride I had in myself for making those positive choices and sticking to them, and I missed how much fun I had in the kitchen creating plant-based meals and making them taste good.

In short, I knew in my heart that veganism was calling me home.

This is what my face looked like around that time. Very inflamed. Very out of sorts. Crawling with mold and Lyme bacteria.

And I don’t mean that in a dramatic, I’m going to live be a label again kind of way. I just mean it in a… I was born for simplicity kind of way. I was not born with an iron stomach that can handle a whole lot of meaty, protein-rich, or even remotely processed or acidic foods. I was born with a sensitive stomach and system that has been my greatest blessing (it brought me to my passion for wellness) and my greatest “curse” for how much pain and turmoil it has brought.

Just imagine for a second how AWFUL I felt in Bali. I was legitimately 20 pounds over my comfortable weight, and for no good reason at all. I was living my life yes, but I was not eating unhealthy foods or overeating in any way. I was exercising and doing everything in my power to feel like me again, and it just wasn’t happening.

I wish I had more photos from that time, but I honestly deleted a lot of them because I was so disheartened by how I felt. I am going to try to dig some more up, but here is a highlight from the trip — when we serendipitously ran into our friends Britt, Tara, EVEREST, and Emily at a vegan cafe in Ubud!!

The Next Steps…

Since I knew I wanted to return to plant-based eating for healing but didn’t want to confine myself with the label that once triggered me to eliminate TOO MANY FOODS… I knew that intuitively plant-based just felt right.

In short, I made the term up. I am sure other people have used it, but the way in which I am using it came straight from my head. Intuitive means to eat straight from the intuition — listening to your own body, honoring its cues, treating it with kindness and loving choices and staying in the moderate lane vs. the extreme lane.

Being intuitively plant-based, I know that if plant-based no longer feels INTUITIVE to me, I will incorporate other foods.

Crazy enough, looking back on that post-Bali feeling and the desire to go plant-based again, I was so on target. I didn’t know at the time that my histamine levels were OFF the charts, causing severe inflammation and hormone imbalances. I had NO testosterone, NO pregnenolone, and a totally sluggish / not working thyroid. I also had Lyme disease, mold poisoning, babesia, Rocky Mountain spotted fever, MCAS, gut dysbiosis, a fibroid the size of a grapefruit, and MORE.

I look back and realize, my intuition was more on point than I could have even imagined or desired it to be! My intuition knew what I needed before I did.

Cutting out grains, eggs, fish, coffee, and other non-vegan foods definitely helped by inflammation go down quite a bit. But I still struggled to get better or feel even halfway decent until I did the water fast and found the salt-oil-sugar-free plant-based lifestyle in June.

And because of my illnesses and the severity of them, I STILL struggle to feel well, but I know that being plant-based helps me immensely. It is anti-inflammatory and because of the nutrients and vitalism and minerals in plant-based it is profoundly healing. It supports my healing from disease as well as my hormonal imbalances and digestion issues.

I have lost a solid 15 pounds which is always an indicator to me that at least SOMETHING is working right inside my body. To be real with you, I still feel like I am holding on to excess inflammation and body weight because my body is struggling so, so deeply to find its balance… but I am not so concerned about that from an outer perspective. I am concerned about what that means for my insides, and I am so, so looking forward to getting my thyroid / testosterone / pregnenolone / iron back in balance and killing the toxins and bacteria in my body to find that balance!

So as you can see, finding the plant-based lifestyle again was a windy road. Four years passed between my last time being vegan and then going the plant-based route again. It is HARD for me not to use the term “vegan” because I identify with so many parts of it… the cruelty-free movement, the benefits for the environment, the health benefits, all of it. But I try hard not to use that term because of everything else it entails — the hardcore “cult ish” parts of it, the judgmental parts, and the UNSWAYING rigidity of it. And by that rigidity  I mean that if I call myself a vegan I may have more trouble incorporating non-vegan foods if I need them for my own personal health.

Currently I will occasionally use colostrum powder (from a cow) to deal my leaky gut,  marine collagen from time to time for protein and skin / bone / joint health, and I have had some Surya Spa bread that has eggs in it. I am not MILITANT by any stretch of the imagination, and I never do want to be militant again!!

I think finding that in-between, moderate, healing, intuitive diet for YOU is what it’s all about. For me right now, that is intuitively plant-based. Not militant. Not even vegan. Just very plant-heavy and very, very in love with the benefits of plant foods and the passion they fill me with when I am eating and when I am in the kitchen.

A yummy plant-based dessert I found in Sedona! Go to CHOCOLATREE if you ever visit Sedona… so many veggie options and the best chocolate of all time. Probably not oil OR sugar free, but def refined sugar free! Sometimes you’ve just gotta live!

I also love plant foods! I don’t feel deprived at all. That is huge. The first time I was vegan, I did feel deprived. I eliminated so many foods and I had food fears within the vegan category that I didn’t touch. I was more of a juice cleanse addict than anything. This time I eat an abundance of foods… even legumes and plant proteins and tempeh! I am all about it. I have had fun playing around in the kitchen and I had grown so much in four years — I never again want to HARM my body by eliminating too many foods.

My focus is on healing. Getting my hormones back into balance and supporting my healing with vital nutrients and enzymes. Having a variety of foods in my diet and ENJOYING the ish out of what I eat and make. Salt oil sugar free makes it even more fun for me because a) I feel sick less of the time, and b) I get to cook at home way more than ever before because its easier than finding foods in a restaurant that support my goals.

I will share a lot more on this topic, but for now wanted to at LEAST address the question and let you know where I’m at with all of it! I am feeling amazing on the food front, and even though I have a long way to go with my healing in general… I feel very, very good about the intuitively plant-based life for ME at this stage.

Would love to hear your thoughts!! Do you eat intuitively? Have you tried the plant-based life, or are you more of a meat eater / vegetarian / paleo / non labeled?!?! I respect all of it!!!

Second post of the day because I am officially back from Hawaii and just can’t get enough of you. But really… when I’m gone I really, really miss writing to you guys. Instagram is one thing (I treat those captions like a long-form blog post, let’s be real), but there is nothing like a good heart-spill post on the site.

This is a topic I have wanted to share with you guys for a while now, but similar to other things I have been experimenting with lately, I knew I had to live it for a while before I announced it on blast. Many of you know I have had a rocky history with veganism, and when I ditched the label to find more balance in my life — shit hit the fan.

I wasn’t about to do any unnecessary boat rocking again because what I went through publicly during that time was gruesome, to say the least. I was picked to SHREDS by the vegan community, and between that and recovering from an eating disorder and trying to understand how non-plant foods fit into my life again… I swung really majorly in one direction. And that direction had nothing to do with plants.

That was almost four years ago. Three years and 9.5 months to be exact. It’s crazy to think that much time has passed, because I really do remember it all like it was yesterday. I became the poster child for orthorexia. (No really, if you look it up on Google you’ll find photos of me splattered everywhere, and “The Blonde Vegan” is a subcategory under the eating disorder.)

To this day, not one day has gone by that a reporter hasn’t emailed to be in a story about orthorexia. For the record, I stopped doing orthorexia interviews about a year and a half ago. After hundreds upon HUNDREDS of news interviews, I couldn’t tell the story a single additional time without going mad.

Running from Orthorexia //

After I announced my split from veganism, I was at a loss for how to move forward. I knew I had to leave my eating disorder and disordered view of food in the dust, but I wasn’t just doing it for me… I was doing it for the hundreds of thousands whose eyes were on me too. Millions, if you count the news stories, night shows, CNN articles, magazine stories, and beyond.

So what did I do? I did what any extreme personality HSP empath does best, I jumped to the extreme. I wanted to please myself and everyone around me. I wanted to show the world and MYSELF especially that I could eat red meat, poultry, dairy, and sugar. I wanted to show them all and show my insides that I could handle it, I was strong, and it wouldn’t kill me.

I will spare you the details of what happened with my stomach during that time, but you can read all about it in my book if you are interested. My body FLIPPED. I felt like complete SH*T on the inside, and not to mention I gained at least 15 pounds, developed cystic acne and chronic fatigue, and a myriad of what became chronic health problems over the last handful of years. And again, I was at a total loss for what to do or where to go.

The New Me, ALL the Protein //

I started working with some great nutritionists and a functional medicine doctor, and all of the advice I was getting was to lean toward a protein-heavy diet. Not quite labeled, but if it were labeled it would be very much paleo / ketogenic. Very low carb, lots of quality animal protein, smoothies with protein, lots of healthy fats, almost no fruit, no sugar, almost no starchy veggies.

I listened and soaked it all in. I wanted to feel better. I wanted to feel like I was living in MY body again. I willed my body to adapt to this new way of life. I begged every inch of it to let go of the stress, the pain, the bloat, the extra pounds, the exhaustion, the hormone imbalances, all of it. It wasn’t really about losing weight but rather feeling like myself again — it was killing me, every inch of me, not to feel like myself in my own body.

I exercised like a fiend. I ran a marathon. I fell in love with exogenous ketones. I willed them to work for me and “fix me” and make me feel like me again. They didn’t. I fell out of love with exogenous ketones. I fell out of love with HIIT & distance running. I got into Ayurveda. I got into meditation, kundalini, and reiki. I learned more and more and more about the mind-body connection. I fell deeper in love with restorative yoga. I fell deeper in love with self-care, and plants, and whole real foods again, and massages and facials and Panchakarma treatments and travel. It all helped, but I was still doing stuff that didn’t work.

I ate eggs daily. I ate bacon. I ate burgers and chicken. I drank coffee like it was my job. I ate a ton of salmon for b12 and omegas. I listened to the protein-heavy diet advice that was coming at me from all angles. In Bali, I realized with INTENSE awareness that I felt like absolute crap.

I had no energy left inside… no Ojas or “life force” as we say in yoga. Jonathan willed me not to pick my face, or scratch my ever-expanding full-body rash, or get upset when our Balinese massage therapist asked me if I was PREGNANT because I was so bloated from my body’s reaction to food. My body felt like anyone’s but my own.

I felt like I was in a prison. Not to mention, feeling ill day in and day out. Having my stomach flip turn before, during and after every meal. Literally feeling my blood sugar rising and falling, dipping and crashing, taking my adrenals for a loop and coursing imbalanced hormones through my body. I tried everything I could to get it under control, for THREE and a HALF YEARS, and I really, truly felt like it would respond to nothing at this point.

The Plant Experiment //

With my growing intuition and my relatively newfound love for self-care, slowing down, shamanism, reiki, kundalini, channeling, and the rest… I knew (KNEW) that plants were calling my name, LOUDLY. I even had an incredible shaman named Ashley Brothers, who I want to have on the podcast soon, tell me that plants have been a part of my soul and past-lives for centuries upon centuries, and she sensed that the plant-based way of life was shouting out to me. To help me uncover and remember, and heal and BE.

Even the “forbidden” fruits that I had been so intensely afraid of because of all of the info that was being thrown my way by so many professionals I was working with. (I don’t discredit anything they say, at all, but my body was not, simply not at all, responding to that diet or way of life. Point blank. I am sure it works great for so many.)

After a particularly difficult few days food-wise and health-wise at the most BEAUTIFUL place on earth — Nihiwatu in Sumba Island, off the coast of Bali — I pledged to myself and to Jonathan (someone’s gotta hear you say it out loud! At least in my case) that I would not touch any of the foods that were killing my body from the inside out until I felt better. That included eggs, meat, coffee, and refined sugar.

And guess what? I haven’t touched one single bit of any of it since.

Just a few weeks later, I decided that my heart and gut was pulling me desperately into the plant-based way of life. I didn’t want to put a label on it, and I am glad I didn’t / haven’t, but predominantly plant-based (about 95% of the time) is how my body is feeling the best right now.

Plants have been healing me from the inside out. They are anti-inflammatory, delicious, nurturing, and actually speak to my soul. I have a long, long history with plants (not just here in this lifetime, but in many lifetimes) and I believe they are my medicine. My wisdom. They heal me on the deepest of levels. That is true for me, not with everyone… but for me, I feel it in my bones.

I didn’t give them the credit or the love they were screaming out for for so long. That goes for veggies AND fruits. Leafy greens AND starchy veggies. Kale AND potatoes. Plant-based smoothies AND lentils, rice, beans (all pressure-cooked), kelp noodles, low glycemic vegan desserts, and more.

It’s not about depriving myself with sugar-free green juice the way I once did… it’s about finding a healthy balance so that I am getting all the protein, vitamins, minerals, and life force energy that I need and deserve.

So many intuitives in my life who I am deeply close to, from Kelsey Patel to Lauren Roxburgh, immediately picked up on my body’s innate need to go back to a largely plant-based way of life. Their permission meant the WORLD, even though I know it;’s all from within… I needed to hear people tell me it was okay. Sometimes we all need that.

The Ayurvedic Way //

It was perfect timing to do my Panchakarma at Surya Spa, because there I ended up going on a kitchari diet for about three weeks… which is inevitably plant-based. All full of rice and mung beans, so not lacking in nutrients or substance in the least.

I then had a consultation with Martha, the head Ayurvedic doctor there who I resonate with on such a deep soul level, and she told me that for me specifically (with my pitta dominance & vata imbalance) to eat predominantly plants and have animal protein rarely, and “only as needed.”

THAT STRUCK SUCH A DEEP CHORD.

To be allowed to eat animal protein / products such an collagen, bone broth, ghee, etc. AS NEEDED. There doesn’t have to be such a strict one way or the other rule. And while I know I have been preaching that for YEARS now… I still felt so, so, so stuck in eating animal protein every day because I felt that I HAD to in order to “not be a vegan.”

I use the word ALLOWED because when you live with chronic stomach problems and health issues, you do get very attached to what you “should” or “shouldn’t” have. How beautiful to have someone give me permission to be plant-based, AND give me permission to eat animal protein / products as needed.

Now I have been plant-based with the occasional bite of fish, sip of bone broth, or collagen smoothie once in a while.

I was about 100% plant-based for all of January and February with the exception of ghee and collagen. And I had my first few bites of fish when I was in Hawaii this past week (so good, not raw though because of my parasites!), and I had a tiny piece of organic chicken at Erewhon the day before I left because… guess what? I CAN. My body was ready for a few bites, and I said HERE YOU GO. Lovingly.

There are no rules, I am just going with the flow. Flying by the seat of my pants. Loving every second. Feeling more and more like myself with every passing day.

My rashes are going away, and my hormones feel like they’re evening out. My body is starting to feel like my own again. My joints don’t hurt if I skip a day (or a WEEK) of yoga. My clothes fit me the way they once did.

Not everything has been healed overnight… I still have the longterm effects of skin issues, the skin disorders (eczema and hives), parasites, imbalances, and more to deal with — but at least I can deal with it with feeling like ME. That’s all I’ve ever wanted, to feel like me again.

My Tips for You //

My advice for you if you are struggling is: don’t take my words and impart them on yourself and your body. Coming to this very personal conclusion of being 95% plant-based right now in this season of my life took so, dang much personal work, journaling, meditation, channeling, drawing inward, experimenting, listening, believing, FAILING (trial and error, so much of it), courage, going against the grain of what I’d been told, facing my fears, and more. I want the same for YOU, however the outcome looks in your own life.

Because the truth is, this time around I did what I had done before with the slippery slope of listening to others & not my own body… it just didn’t look like so much of a problem as it did the first time. When I was vegan, I inadvertently listened and took in the advice of the raw vegan community and the “40 Bananas a Day” YouTubers. I juice cleansed for a living. THAT was unhealthy, and it looked that way to the outside world and family and friends too.

This time… I listened to a more balanced approach, but I was still listening to others. “Strive for X amount of protein every day, get your body into ketosis, avoid starches and fruits, be careful with the legumes” on and on. I LISTENED. I soaked it in. I was at a loss, and I wanted guidance.

And maybe that’s what I needed for a period of time. Who’s to say. I learned a lot, and I don’t regret anything. I respect everyone I have worked with and sought advice from, and NO ONE is wrong. They just don’t live inside of my body, and living inside of your own body is the only, only, only, only, ONLY place you can get true and real answers.

But in order to do that, you must be deeply in tune. I watch documentaries like “Fed Up” for example, and it’s very clear to me that not everyone is in a position to get deep internal cues and messages from their own body. We all start somewhere, and for some people starting with trusting a nutritionist, doctor, or trainer, is PERTINENT in order to get healthy.

For me, someone who researches and lives the lifestyle of wellness pretty much day in day out, who BREATHES health and vitality and foods that make us feel good… for me, it’s all about tuning in. Drawing in. Listening.

So that’s what I am doing now. If my body asks me for a juicy slab of red meat tomorrow, I’ll eat it. But I won’t quit on my veggies and fruits again. I won’t ditch my kitchari, spices, herbs, or foods from the earth ever again. I won’t turn my back on the healthy foods that ignite me deep from within and are the reason I started my blog in the first place.

Where I Am Now //

For so long, I ran from orthorexia. I was so, so scared of being “STUCK” again with so many food fears and anxieties. But in the last four years, I have grown. I don’t believe in so much of the stigma and labeling and fear that used to rule my life. I worked through it, and because of that — I feel confident AF in this position again. Being almost completely plant-based feels incredibly, sensationally good in my body right now.

The best part? I DON’T HAVE TO RUN FROM ANYTHING. Orthorexia is not chasing me. It’s nowhere near me, in fact. Everything has changed. I have grown. It’s so empowering.

I will keep you guys updated from here on out. Keeping this little dietary way of life to myself (well, only as much as I possibly could…. I feel like I’ve blabbed it discreetly a lot over the last few months — come on, it’s ME lol) has felt really good. I needed to, in order to figure out what it meant and what it looks like for me.

A message for everyone: veggies and fruits have the power to HEAL us. If you are allergic to them, can’t handle them, your system hates fruit, etc. then obviously listen to yourself and not me. But for the majority of people out there, it’s a fact. PLANTS HEAL. A few resources that have helped me get over my fruit fear and my plant-based/vegan-ish fears recently:

– The Medical Medium Life-Changing Foods

– The Plant Paradox

– Medical Medium: Secrets Behind Chronic & Mystery Illness & How to Heal

– And if you’ve never read my book, Breaking Vegan, it is an account of everything I have described in this post / my orthorexia healing journey. So dear to my heart.

Would love to hear your thoughts on all that I’ve shared, and would love to hear your current approach to food, lifestyle, labels or no labels, health, ALL of it.

Love you guys.

As always, respect and appreciate every type of lifestyle: from vegan to paleo, label-free to diehard keto, fruitarian to mega carnivore. This is a loving, accepting, open space to share your thoughts.

X

Blogging is still one of my favorite ways to connect with you guys since writing is my bread & butter, but I have been having so much fun on the podcast, writing SPIRIT JUICE, doing all of the wellness-y & spiritual research for my next book, and just living in the moment and being present. It doesn’t always leave time (well time yes, energy not so much) to blog the way I want to, but that is changing soon.

Because REAL TALK… I am getting some help so that I can balance it all and still blog at leeeeast a few times a week because that’s what feels right to me & it’s what I want.

If you’ve been reading the blog for a while, then you know I am all about the LIST posts, so I thought what better way to inspire myself to blog today than to write a list? 20 things you probably don’t know about me… coming right up!

P.S. I am offering 50% on my SOUL ON FIRE YOGA EBOOK this weekend with the code “soultribe” at checkout. Hop on it and flow to your heart’s content, my angels.

20 Things About Me //

1. Depending on the day, I can be very extroverted or very introverted. I am one of those zero to a hundred people. I am either making plans all day long and feeling like a bundle of energy, or in bed reading a book with my phone turned off and no desire to even respond to a text message. I used to wish I was more “balanced” between the two, but I now embrace both sides of myself wholeheartedly. I think I get the best of both worlds from my sociable side and surrounding myself with lots of amazing souls, and from my reserved side where I get a lot of down time to draw inward, create, and be alone with my thoughts. I’ve learned that I NEED both in order to be happy and to function optimally (or at all!).

2. Over the years I have become very passionate about body love and learning to love myself EXACTLY as I am, but only recently have I really started practicing loving myself in every way, shape and form in the way that we all deserve. One of the things that has been the most transformative is looking in the mirror and repeating, “You are beautiful. You are perfect. You are so more than enough. I love you, endlessly and effortlessly, exactly as you are.” I mean repeating it a LOT. It works more wonders than you will know, and I have now been able to replace the negative thoughts I had on loop about myself with positive, loving, transformational thoughts. (The same things I would say to a friend — so I am treating my body like my own best friend, and it feels amazing and so empowering.)

3. I could easily eat breakfast for every meal of the day. I also love eggs SO MUCH even though I recently learned I have a mild allergy to them. Of course, that only makes me want them even more… same with coffee!! If you also experience the coffee allergy, check out my faves at Four Sigmatic and use the code BLONDE for 15% off. Mushroom coffee is where it’s at, and its the top projected food trend of 2018… just sayin’.

4. On the subject of food, ever since I wrote my memoir Breaking Vegan many people who don’t know me assume I am a full-blown carnivore. Quite the contrary, I am largely plant-based a HUGE majority of the time. I just don’t ascribe to the labels anymore, which has been incredibly freeing for me personally. Whenever someone lashes out at me for eating animals, I giggle to myself about the fact that people on the Internet pretty much never, ever have any idea what they are talking about. But I do believe label-free is the way to be, which is why leaving that “vegan” label was the healthiest choice I ever made for my personal body.

5. Finding my spiritual side has enhanced my life in every way. I was raised Jewish although we were never very religious. This year, I have discovered my own self prayer through meditation, kundalini, reiki, breath work, mediumship, automatic writing, and so much more. I live for the moments I am so deep in meditation that I can access my subconscious as if its my conscious mind. That happened yesterday in yoga and it was SO COOL — I was able to relive all of my dreams from the night before! It’s such a fun new form of exploration for me and I can’t wait to write more about it.

6. Speaking of spiritual life, I did my first Past Life Regression Therapy a couple of weeks ago and it was amazing. I will write about it in full soon, but I got to see two different past lives of mine and also saw earlier in this lifetime. I saw that my current dad has been my dad for many lifetimes, which makes me feel even closer to him. I also saw that I was a well-known female fiction writer about 150 years ago in Europe, and that was the coolest thing ever. I was able to access my subconscious and learn that part of my purpose in this lifetime is to continue writing fiction… amazingly cool since I have always loved it but haven’t done much of it in the last few years. I was also a female human who looked very much the way I look now in both previous lifetimes I saw, even though I was really crossing my fingers I was going to be see an alien lifetime! LOL #notkidding.

6. I am the youngest of four and I am the baby in every way. I am one of those people who you meet and say, “Oh, I bet you’re the baby of your family.” People say it to me ALL the time. Not in a bad way… but some things are just obvious with certain personality traits! I like when people guess correctly about those kinds of things… it makes the world feel smaller and more connected in my opinion.

7. Similarly, when I am traveling to a different state or country people always know that I am from California. Even last week in Arizona an older man at J’s Iron Man said to me, “Oh, you MUST be from what’s that place!?!? Where all the girls are blonde and sound just like you?! Ohhhh yeah, Orange County.” I used to be slightly offended because I didn’t want to have such an obviously valley girl voice, but now I embrace it. I am a California girl, born and raised. There is no reason to deny who we are, and I unbiasedly think California is the best — we have the ocean, the mountains, the country, the city… so many gems.

8. Before I started dating Jonathan, I was in a slew of extremely unhealthy relationships. Starting in high school (maybe even middle school) I jumped from one unhealthy relationship to the next. I dated guys who didn’t want to be with me, drug addicts (and recovering drug addicts), a guy who cheated on me right in front of me, and many others who sucked my soul and my belief that I deserved anything more than consistent heartbreak. I truly believe we are all meant to have a specific series of experiences that lead us up to meeting the person of our dreams, so that we can appreciate them and everything about them wholeheartedly.

9. That said, I have recently learned about the differences between “soul mates” and “twin flames.” I always called Jonathan by soul mate but now it is 100% clear to me that we are twin flames. I read about the differences in Material Girl, Mystical World which I HIGHLY recommend, and you can also read about the two here. If you’re in a relationship, it’s fun to read up & see which one you feel best represents you and your partner.

10. I am very obsessed with music. I used to be so confused about why I would have such emotional reactions to certain songs or artists, why I seriously would not be able to turn off songs/albums that I loved and would play them hundreds and hundreds of times… and I have now realized it’s one of the ways my soul spiritually connects to the world. If you want to stalk me on Spotify, here is my profile. Warning: I listen to the same things over and over a LOT!! Mainly Trevor Hall, Eminem, & John Mayer… to name a few.

11. I have had a really hard time in recent years about feeling like my energy is being “taken from” me. I am sure everyone relates in some way or another, and especially people who have a public platform like a blog, podcast, or social media following. I have had a lot of friendships begin that quickly (or not so quickly) turned out to be more of a using situation where I realized I was consistently being asked to share something, promote someone, or connect them to someone else. Sometimes it’s so obvious I can now see it from ten million miles away, but other times it’s still very subtle. Regardless, I think we are all in charge of our own energy and the most valuable thing I’ve learned this year (from the AMAZING Shaman Durek on the podcast), is that we all have infinite love to give.

12. Because of that notion that we all have infinite love to give, I have had an easier time lately accepting that mostly everyone means well. And if a person means well, then I have love to give them. If I sense that they don’t mean well or that our relationship is one-sided, I simply won’t share or give my love freely. That not only makes me feel more protected and energized, but it makes me feel in my power because I don’t see it necessary to always do things for other people. It’s hard because I am very much a people pleaser, I’ve always wanted everyone to “like me,” and these days I feel… we just can’t be everyone’s cup of tea. It’s better that way, because then the people we do connect closely with are so special and so meant to be in our lives.

13. In the same vein, I have no tolerance for low vibe, surface-level, energy sucking relationships. There are too many amazing people and things to focus on in this world — there is no reason to spend time with people who make us feel less than 1,000% appreciated and seen.

14. When I close my eyes I see the color bright purple in the middle of my third eye — I’ve been told that is the color for MEDIUMS. I have even been able to translate a couple of conversations from people who have passed on to their loved ones… it’s trippy. And so fun. And I am in the midst of learning more so I can share more about that with you guys!

15. My parents are two of my favorite people in the whole entire universe. They are also two of the most selfless, funny, genuine, kind and generous human beings on this earth. My mom also has an amazing fashion blog, and she is singlehandedly the reason why I only wear yoga clothes these days because she dressed me my whole life so I don’t really have a clue when it comes to fashion!! lol.

16. Next year I will be leading a couple of retreats (yay!!!). One is in Palm Springs that I am co-leading with the amazing reiki master Kelsey Patel, and you can get tickets & more info here. That one is almost sold out, so if you want to come — get  your spot a.s.a.p! The second will be in Kauai in June (most likely) so stay tuned for info about that… I absolutely cannot wait.

17. When I really think about it, I know that the life I have now was completely a result of my manifestation process. When I am having a difficult day or had time, I remember: this is the life I wanted and called in for myself! How beautiful and how lucky. Of course things are not perfect and I always want to grow, evolve, shift, change and build upon this life — but remembering that my life now is the life I dreamed of years ago… that is a powerful feeling. I am working on giving myself CREDIT for all that I have built and created. In the past I was quick to dismiss my accomplishments out of wanting to appear and feel humble… but I no longer believe that is the best way to be. I think being proud of ourselves and owning who we are and where we’ve come is HUGE and only allows expansion for further manifestation, power, soulful connections and growth.

18. Being an aunt to my nieces and nephew is one of my favorite things in the whole entire world, and same with being a cat mama. I can’t even imagine how I will feel about my human children one day… I am going to love on them so hard I won’t even know what to do with myself!

19. Hudson is the first animal I’ve ever had (unless you count the fish I had as a kid), and he has taught me so much about myself, taking care of a little creature, putting someone else first, slowing down, breathing, what really matters, and so much more.

20. When I’m at home, I’m surrounded by at least 10 crystals. In my bra, on my chest, in my hands, under my pillow, surrounding my computer, inside of my books… you name it, they’re there. I love crystal energy and I love programming them each for something specific. Next year I am taking an in-depth astrology course and I cannot waaaaaait to connect my crystals with the stars, moon and moon phases even more than I already have!
Would love to learn more about you! I love that you guys are here reading, and if you enjoyed this I would love to know so that I can make SUREEEE to blog more and keep sharing from the heart on this platform. Tell me a few things about you either here in the comments or on my latest Instagram post so that I can follow you back and support you in return!! X

one day very recently i woke up and i was sick of being controlled by food.

and maybe you think i’m talking about three years ago when i transitioned away from veganism and took control of my eating disorder (orthorexia) by letting go of the labels and learning to eat intuitively and bountifully.

or mayyyyybe you think i’m talking about my health journey post-veganism with the long road of dedication to balancing my hormones and trying to treat and cure various parasites, imbalances, gut issues and infections through functional medicine, ayurveda, acupuncture, restorative yoga, all sorts of diet changes and lifestyle adjustments, supplements, probiotics, alternative treatments and therapies, and the thousands of other things i’ve dabbled in.

(for the record, i still love & do/use all of those things.)

if i were you, i’d think i was talking about one or both of the above too.

but the truth is, i am talking about something far more recent. i am talking about a shift that is taking place in me RIGHT NOW, even after all this time.

well, after a whole lifetime really of stomach problems.

i have considered myself mostly recovered from full-blown orthorexia for a while now. i feel very grateful that my brain tends to work in the way that once i realize something and become intensely aware of it — i can begin to let go, work on it and move forward.

after i started introducing more foods into my life post-veganism i struggled a lot, but my orthorexia shifted into something else. it shifted back into what it was pre-veganism for me — which was a general discomfort about & around food because for my entire life, food has made me feel rather shitty.

so even though that’s not nearly the same as the depths of my former orthorexia, it has been similarly difficult albeit way more manageable and balanced.

i have an insanely sensitive stomach. trust me, it’s textbook undiagnosable

i have spent two full decades and then some wishing that i had an answer that came in the form of a diagnosis so that i could treat it and live comfortably without food fears, anxiety about what i am putting into my body, major stomach pain and bloating, IBS, hormone imbalances (post-eating disorder… newer problem), lethargy after eating, indigestion and constipation, acid reflux, etc.

in the realm of all things gut-problems… you name it, i’ve experienced it.

so as much as i have recovered from the eating disorder i once seriously suffered from, i have still had a lot of trouble with food for the last three years. just want to keep it real with you guys. mentally, i’m GOOD. physiologically, my gut issues are a beast of their own.

i keep it to myself most of the time because who wants to be “THAT girl” who still has all of those food intolerances, can barely touch what her friends / family make her or want her to try, avoids alcohol 99.9% of the time because it makes her feel hungover for an unusually extended period of time, and on top of all of that… now people worry that i still have an eating disorder if i express too much concern about ingredients or meal times or alcohol or what have you.

so i really don’t want to go too into depth about all of the above (even though i sooooo could) because this is NOT a “woe is me” post about my stomach problems. at all. been there, done that.

this is about the revelation i recently had that i really think is going to help me, a lot. and hopefully it will help you too!

so let’s talk about that revelation…

it pretty much started while i was having a super open heart-to-heart convo (the best kind) with my dear assistant + friend christina while at the GOOP health summit last weekend. (so yes, gwyneth was indeed just a few seats down from us while this convo took place. important #sidenote.)

we have BOTH (christina and myself) experienced straight up turmoil with our stomachs over the years. it’s just a hard way to live — and i know a lot of you have been here and know exactly what i am talking about. (although i do understand and know things could be way worse!)

i was expressing to christina how sick i am of feeling this way — of trying so hard to do what feels right for my body, only to have my body backfire on me and feel inflamed to the bone with total rejection of what i’m eating / drinking / fueling myself with.

she gave me a ton of good insight that i won’t even go into at this exact moment… but her words inspired me to take a deeper look at my approach.

she reminded me that as far as setting myself up to feel good, my lifestyle is on POINT. i make all of the self-care choices my heart desires, i live an unapologetically wellness-oriented life full of yoga, healthy food, positive friendships and relationships, and even a wellness-focused career.

my exercise and sleep are pretty darn good too. it’s just that food component. that one tricky thing that always sneaks up on me no matter how hard i try to avoid that happening.

for the last several months i have tried to follow the “wait 4-6 hours between meals, intermittent fasting, bulletproof in the morning” type of dietary structure for the most part. i have NOT been crazy rigid with it because as we know that doesn’t work for me — but eating that way made me feel good for a long while so i stuck with it.

then i started feeling not so bueno again. just really imbalanced and not good. my skin is always a good indicator of how my gut health is doing — and for the last two months, my skin has been inflamed and breaking out like a mofo.

so now i am trying a new approach.

i realized i got really attached to the way i’ve been eating for the last year or so because in the beginning, it was working. just like veganism!

but i truly believe, time and time again, that doing the same thing every day and expecting my body to want/need the SAME type of fuel each day just doesn’t work for me.

so now i am focusing on something a bit different.

it doesn’t have a name, or a label, or a cult following, and it’s not the answer to everyone’s gut health problems – but i have a feeling it might be the answer (or part of the answer) to mine.

my hormones are out of whack. i know this because i am a highly sensitive person and i KNOW what’s going on in my body even if i can’t pinpoint why or what exactly is going on (if i could, i think i’d be a medical medium, so i wish i could!!!).

but i do know generally what’s going on. and it ain’t pretty.

so instead of skipping breakfast every day for bulletproof coffee and living that intermittent fasting life, i am going to focus on really nourishing my body from the inside out. i am going to make it my mission to LISTEN to my body… eat when I’m hungry, and eat three square meals a day to balance out my hormones and let my body know and trust that nutrients will be coming in at normal times of day.

( nothing against bulletproof, i will still be having it when i feel like it!!! it’s PART of my lifestyle, but it doesn’t have to be the end-all be-all everyday go-to. )

maybe some days that will mean i wake up and I’m not hungry for a few hours. i will listen to my bod and won’t force anything. other days that might mean more snacks and eating smaller meals than usual, which is also cool.

i remember a brief window of time a few years ago — between starting to eat plant-based and becoming a full-blown food-eliminator… when i felt really normal. my gut health was at bay, and my hormones were nice and balanced. what i did back then was LISTEN TO MY BODY, cook almost all of my meals at home, focus on healthy, whole, real foods from the earth, eat smaller meals more often (so i was never overly full or overly hungry), and trust my intuition about what would / wouldn’t feel good.

i had no dependency on things back then like coffee and dark chocolate and kombucha and coconut butter and certain other things that these days i feel freakishly addicted to because i know things are just off inside of me.

for a brief little period of time in my life, things were REAAAAL good with my stomach. just normal.

and i want to get back to that. i know that for ME (and i keep specifying this because we are allllll different and i just simply have no idea if this is good for YOU or not) never getting TOO hungry or TOO full is also a key.

eating smaller meals throughout the day. not letting my stomach get inflamed and bloated from eating just two main meals a day, full of variety and nutrients during those times only.

more of a balanced, spread out approach.

i also really resonate with the ayurvedic approach to eating, which is also rooted in ancient indian cultures. in that culture and approach, keeping it SIMPLE is the way to go. not a ton of wild sauces, superfoods, over the top ingredients (even when they’re healthy), and not a ton of mixing foods together.

keeping it simple — two to three things at once. protein and rice, beans and quinoa, chia pudding by itself and not buried in toppings, fruit by itself and not slathered in nut butter… you feel me.

not always the most exciting, especially for a foodie like me, but it IS exciting to feel good in your own body.

with minimal caffeine ( not cutting it out entirely, because that ish does make me feel good! i can use it like medicine, as we do in ayurveda, if i don’t rely on it fully ), minimal to no sugar because it just doesn’t work for me, and a few other things i won’t go into detail about because – again  – we are all diff and i don’t want you to feel like my plan is YOUR plan.

this is just my own personal experiment, and i’m crossing my fingers it really starts to do good things for me.

i will say, for the last week… i’ve been doing this and i have been feeling good. my friend laura hadn’t seen me in weeks, and she told me yesterday that i am looking so BALANCED and GOOD and HEALTHY… which i took as a huger than life compliment. because i am trying, and that is all that i want – to feel good and to radiate that outward.

i am also reincorporating running and HIIT into my life after being rather fearful of them for a while when i was in my very, very low-impact phase of working out. i don’t want to be afraid of anything, and i know that variety is good for my particular body, so i am doin’ it and it feels really, really good so far. still a lot of yoga too, always.

sooooo that’s where i’m at, peeps.

i am not a doctor and i don’t ever want to be considered an expert with these little experiments that i do because our bodies are so intensely personal. it’s all US, and we are all different. i want to feel good and i want YOU to feel good, and i will keep sharing my story in hopes of inspiring you to dig deep within yourself to do the same.

i will keep you all updated, but if nothing else i wanted to share this because its a very big and important side of who i am, and i never want to withhold info and act like everything is perfect in TBB land when my gut health is truly just out of whack.

thoughts?!? love getting real with you guys. excited to see where this takes me… so much love. xx

I love, love, love hosting and speaking at events where I get to meet you guys (my amazing blog readers), because it makes what I do on a daily basis (write for the Internet) feel so much more real and rewarding and tangible.

I love having a microphone in my hand — laugh if you want, but true. I actually really enjoy it! Lol.

A photo from the WANT panel a few months ago in Malibu!

I also love hosting events where I get to connect with awesome likeminded souls who don’t yet know about my blog but are interested in similar things as me from wellness to entrepreneurship to #girlboss-ness to yoga to downright sharing from the heart/spreading good vibes.

I love hosting when I get to co-host with awesome, badass women and dudes who I really get along with and whose missions align super closely with mine. Some of my recent faves include the baking class + balanced life seminar I hosted with my boo Sweet Laurel Bakery (you can watch our YouTube recap of the event HERE) and my book signing in Sacramento a few months ago with all of my lifelong love bugs in attendance.

Hi Laurel & Christina. MUAH.

Some events fill my heart with crazy amounts of love and joy. I won’t focus on the ones that don’t… But trust me, I accidentally get involved in plenty of events/situations that don’t fill me up with love + happiness.

A small example is a book signing I hosted where I had pretty much a falling out with my co-hosts AFTER the event (for various reasons), but looking back on it now it makes my stomach feel weird/my heart hurt because even though the event itself was good — there are now bad vibes surrounding the sitch.

Other times I’ve had not-so-good experiences because things are expected of me that I’m not comfortable doing, AND there was that whole period of my life where I was about-to-not-be-vegan anymore and I was still hosting vegan events and speaking at vegan seminars. So there’s that.

Anyway, a place that always, ALWAYYYSSSS fills my heart with epic amounts of love & joy when I host an event there is GINGERSNAP’S ORGANIC in the West Village of NYC.

There are a few reasons for that:

a) Jamie, the owner of Gingersnap’s and often my event co-host, is an all around incredible human. She inspires me, motivates me, and makes me feel so whole & so “SEEN” when I am around her. You know those people? People who are just very connect-worthy and enjoyable to share space with. She is also full of so much knowledge about wellness and life in general… She is someone I feel safe sharing my issues & concerns with, because she’s been there for me many times. So I love hosting events with her for that reason above all else!

b) the environment is AWESOME and always brings a very good time

c) the food is so, so yummy, healthy and right up my alley

d) the people who tend to come to my events at Gingersnap’s are people who I connect with so easily, who GET me, who support what I am doing, and who rock.

That being said, if you’re into having fun + sharing good vibes, come to my event at Gingersnaps on June 15th (a week from Weds) from 7-9pm if you’re NYC local! You can get tickets here.

For the ticket price you’ll get a signed copy of my book, a signed copy of Jamie’s book, delish food from Gingersnaps, and great company of course.

I am so, so excited to host my first (and maybe only?) NYC BOOK SIGNING for Breaking Vegan! As you know, the book is my most cherished project, and NYC is my most cherished city… So it’s going to be a partay. Even my MOM is going to be there who is the most fun and stylish and wonderful woman in existence.

Let me know if you have any questions or if you’re thinking about coming… I’d LOVE to have you!!! And if you’re not NYC local… Stay tuned for upcoming events. Moral of the story of this post: I’m only trying to host / be involved with evens that are super meaningful to me at this point. Picking & choosing. It’s the way to go. <3 

XO (PS most of my events end up being a lot like the below… So COME HANG)

Readdyyyy? Let’s get it goin’!

▷▸▹► Kitten Snugs. So if you follow me on social media, you are well aware that I am in love with my four month old kitten Hudson Riley. Obsessed. Cat mom central. I may as well plan to never leave LA again because every time I leave him (with friends/fam, of course) for even a few days, my heart aches for him so badly and I have to actively try very hard not to think about him or wonder what he’s doing at every waking second of the day. One of my absolute favorite things as a first-time pet owner is how SNUGGLY Huddy is. He nestles himself right up into my chin to fall asleep at night, and while I write on the couch during the day he wraps his furry little arms around my legs to get in some good cuddles while he naps. I may sound like a total kitten mama freak to you right now, but anyone who has had a serious bond with a pet knows what I’m talking about. It’s just me and Hudson at home — no roommates, no significant others, no nada. We have developed a super intensely close relationship, and from the moment I got him I tried to get him used to being around people / cuddling / being held in my arms. When he stares into my eyes I can FEEL his little soul connecting with mine, and it’s one of the best feelings in the world. My baby Hud has my whole heart.

Below photo taken by the fab Iselin + Hale, a.k.a Huddy’s beautiful Auntie Danika

▷▸▹► Good photography. I am an absolute sucker for great photography. Actually, I’m a sucker for anything creative that is done well and done with passion and good intentions. I had such an amazing day shooting for Eddie Bauer with the talented Katie Shuler a few weeks ago, and while we were snapping pics we had an incredible conversation about branding. We discussed the difference between someone who is super passionate and clear about their brand identity versus someone who “sells out” to try to either copy someone else’s brand, be the next big thing, make the most $$ possible off of their brand, etc. There is a fine line when you’re creating a brand based around creativity and personality, because of course you have to monetize it (for me, that means brand partnerships), but people are really there to hear you write and create content from your SOUL. Katie experiences similar feelings when it comes to branding her photography business, as far as only wanting to take on clients’ tastes that radiate the aesthetic she is most passionate about. Where I’m getting at with all of this is — Katie Shuler’s photography brought me to TEARS when I saw the photos we’d taken. They were just so, so, so, so ME and so what I am going for with The Balanced Blonde (remember in yesterday’s post I talked about honing in on my focus). My emotional reaction to her photos from our day was such a beautiful reminder that while sometimes I have to pump out content like it’s my job (because it is), it is SO important to wind down, reflect, and really think hard about partnerships that I agree to. This blog is my baby, my muse and my livelihood, and I want it to have as much longevity as possible — a.k.a I want to do it forever! Cheeeers to good photography to supplement the messages and stories I am so passionate about sharing.

▷▸▹► Making up my own hashtags. I spoke on a panel at Social Media Club LA on Tuesday night, and I found myself giving this advice to the audience of creative entrepreneurs: make up your own hashtags! Be silly with it. Use them to showcase your personality. Stray away from the #thinspo, #thinspiration, #skinnybitch kinds of hashtags because to be honest, those aren’t empowering women at all. They are promoting one lifestyle, and usually they are promoting one singular way of eating and/or living. I am ALL about gaining inspiration from people on social media and the Internet, but wellness advice and weight loss advice do not go hand in hand. I am not a medical professional and I have never claimed to be– I am all about sharing real life experiences with real life people! #nodisclaimerneeded, because I just share my tips and tricks and use hashtags like #TBBisobsessedwithkale and #TBVapparelallovertheworld and #thebloglife and whatever I feel like typing in that very moment. I am all about that real time talk — being REAL with my audience has never served me wrong. Don’t try to be cool, try to be you.

 ▷▸▹► TBV Apparel partnering with Elite Daily! One of the coolest things about working in the social media influencer space is having the opportunity to connect with other influencers who are KILLING it. Elite Daily is beyond the prime example of that (they’ve grown to 1 million followers from about 40k earlier this year and we are obsessed with them), and we were lucky enough to partner with them for a shopping spree giveaway to TBV Apparel! Congrats to miss Jennilynn F. on Instagram for WINNNINNNGGG – we cannot wait for you to pick out your swag!

▷▸▹► GRAZE Snack Boxes! I am all about the healthy, portion-controlled snack options out there — because while I am all about balance and listening to your bod, I also know that a lot of people who are trying to find and maintain a healthy lifestyle need a little bit of help in the portion department. I love Graze because their subscription snack boxes customize a selection of healthy snacks that come in fun little containers with the coolest names — like Banana’s Foster (banana chips + nuts + little fudge pieces), Berries & Cream Gelato (white chocolate buttons, mini dried strawberries, dried raspberry strings, yogurt covered strawberry pieces) and all sorts of combinations of dry-roasted, unsalted nuts. The snacks are all pre-packaged and light-weight, so you can pack them with you and take them on-the-go (I like to snack on them in the car after a day of meetings / before yoga), and they aren’t going to overly fill you up before your next meal. Check them out on their website, and tell me this service isn’t one of the coolest ever…

I also did a Q&A with them that you must read! So fun. **Lastly, use code BBLONDE to get your first box of Graze FREE!!!**

▷▸▹► Seeing my BOOK on shelves at Barnes & Noble!!! Okay, honesty: I haven’t been into a B&N yet since the book has launched (life has been too crazy for words), BUT a lot of my friends, family, fellow bloggers and even my mama have spotted the book at B&N and sent me fun photos and videos! It is truly a surreal feeling to know that the book is out there and reaching people that have never seen my blog and are not yet familiar with my story, and that makes me so happy I could burst. Here’s a photo my mama snapped at the book store and then uploaded to her Instagram on her OWN (very impressive, as I often post for her…!!). It made my day like you wouldn’t believe.

▷▸▹► Almond milk lattes. YEP. I put “almond milk lattes” on our TBV Apparel “Loving Lately” tee when we created that list over a year ago, but in all honesty I was way more of a cold brew with almond milk kinda gal. Lately I have been ALL about my iced almond milk lattes from Alfred (my place, you know this) — and I add an extra shot of espresso for that extra fuel. I’ve been getting it nearly every single morning so I couldn’t not share. It’s definitely on the list.

▷▸▹► Foray Collective. Okay, so this is awesome. A few lovely gals I know started Foray Collective as a new kind of shopping platform to discover both style inspiration and cutting-edge designers. They’ve gathered a mix of influencers from all platforms to help tell the stories of each brand, and I am lucky enough be sharing my passion for fitness and comfort/athleisure in partnership with one of Foray’s athletic wear brands Booty by Brabants. I certainly love a good pair of neon pants, especially when I am headed into a yoga class or when I’m running at night (it gets dark SO EARLY NOW and I like to stand out so cars don’t see me). Their stuff fits so comfortably and has that extra stretch and versatility that makes them especially perfect for gym-to-errand activities (a.k.a my life in a nutshell). Check ’em out below! Wearing their Rosa Leggings & Spandex Tank Top. Love both, for the record.

▷▸▹► VIRTUAL BLOG TOOOOUR: Breaking Vegan is being shared on so many lovely blogs that I admire and read on the daily. Yesterday Andie Mitchell featured the Pumpkin Spice Smoothie recipe from the book on her blog, and today the lovely Hanna Montazami & Kelly LeVeque will be sharing. Stay tuned for Davida of The Healthy Maven and Lauryn of The Skinny Confidential  to share later this week — along with some fun giveaways sprinkled in!

What are you guys loving lately? Anything I mentioned here strike your fancy in particular? PS, I CANNOT believe that next week is Thanksgiving — headed to Cabo with the fam and I am so exciiited!!

A) Head is SPINNING with everything going on! And I’m not saying that in an, “Ugh, I’m so busy I don’t even have time to blog” kind of way. I’m saying it in a “Wow, my brain is in overdrive and there is so much to focus on” kind of way — and when I feel that way, it can be really hard for me to write from the heart. It’s kind of like how I spent all of my free time writing fictional stories for fun until I went to grad school for creative writing and could NOT for the life of me focus on creative writing. And that was because I was so focused on the blog. And nooowwww I am so focused on the book and trying to keep everything in order with my current travel sched that a lot of ideas I’ve had for the blog have just felt — DULL. And I refuse to write dull content for you guys. So I’ve kept my posts to a bit of a minimum lately while I let my head do the lil’ spinning thing that it’s been so good at lately…

B) TRAVEL! I mentioned it above, but that has been a huge one. Whenever I get into the routine of traveling a lot, my normal sched gets much more difficult to maintain. I often trick myself into thinking that I will be fine and get tons of work done on the plane, in the hotel room, etc, which DOES happen, but not quite the most creative stuff. I can stay up to date on emails, projects, TBV Apparel, interviews and other things of that sort, but when it comes to creating content for the blog, I like to be in a very specific headspace. And when I am on a red eye to Miami and then spending 3 days on a boat I am stimulated in a whole different way, but not necessarily in the creative way.

C) I am so inspired, I want to let some things sink in. I had an unreal time at the Summit at Sea event I was at this weekend. I got to hear panelists speak from Martha Stewart to John Legend to Eric Schmidt (CEO of Google) to Travis Kalahnick (CEO of Uber) to Mark Sisson (writer of the Primal Blueprint) to some of the most badass yoga teachers in the biz and more… And wow, did I soak in a LOT. Emotions, motivation, inspiration, intense feelings, new friendships, super deep conversations, lots of reflection about all sorts of things that have been going on lately, refining my focus/vision of the future of my brand and so much more. With so much shifting and evolving within my vision, I have felt it especially necessary to take a few breaths before pushing out content.

D) Now that the book is out, my story is OUT THERE. For those of you that have read my book, you know that it captures a lot of my life. From my intensely personal eating disorder journey to details about my childhood, my lifelong relationship with food, my vegan journey, recent family hardships and so much more — I put a lot of sh*t on the table. Now that that is all out there, I am free to move forward and move on from the eating disorder recovery chit chat. I will always be here for you guys to talk to, ask questions to, vent to, relate to, etc. when it comes to eating disorder recovery, but I am personally at a point where I very much look forward to moving on from that phase of my life — so the blog will be moving along right alongside of it. That is a very special and groundbreaking feeling — and also a terrifying one, because bringing the brand in somewhat of a new direction is always terrifying!

E) I love sharing healthy recipes & restaurants with you guys, but I am getting misrepresented about my food choices in the media & it has made me step back a little. You’ve seen the headlines… “Veganism almost killed her,” “How girl almost died while on a vegan diet,” “Vegan diet threatened TBB’s life,” and so on. Well, I am here to tell you that none of that is true. The media likes to sensationalize things and twist words to make headlines. I have been thrown into the fire a little bit because some people assume I am cool with those headlines, but I’m not. It’s been really heartbreaking to watch my story get twisted and watch words being put into my mouth — and a whole community of people have been angered because of it. I choose not to focus on the negativity being slung my way, because I know that I have represented myself in a very truthful and authentic way. Anyone who chooses to look into my story will see that. BUT it has made me slightly uncomfortable about sharing MY version of healthy food with you guys right now, because I feel that I’m damned if I do and I’m damned if I don’t. I am not anti-vegan, and I don’t eat junk food. I have been getting slammed for being “too healthy” on one end of the spectrum and slammed for not being healthy enough on the other end — this isn’t affecting me on a personal level, but stepping away from writing recipes on the blog to reflect about what kinds of recipes I am MOST passionate about sharing with you guys feels like the right thing right now.

F) Interviews!!! I have been doing a lot of awesome interviews for the book lately. You can find me in this month’s issue of ELLE Magazine, I am on my dear friend Andie Mitchell’s blog today, I will be on The Angriest Trainer podcast in coming weeks (so fun talking to him), Maddy Moon’s Mind Body Musings, Kathryn Budig’s blog, and more. I will keep you guys all very posted on that — all super exciting!

Who’s with me?! When I have a lot going on, it can be the most difficult thing in the world to just FOCUS and feel creatively stimulated. Would love to hear everyone’s thoughts. I’ll be back tomorrow with a Loving Lately post — woo woo!

Active Ingredients: zinc oxide 15%, prunus amygdalus dulcis (sweet almond) oil 7%, colloidal oatmeal 2%, allantoin 1%.

Inactive Ingredients: beeswax/cire d’abeille, butyrospermum parkii (shea) butter, buxux chinensis (jojoba) oil, glycine soja (soybean) oil, paraffin wax, petrolatum, tocopherol.

SO! Who wants healthy skin? I’m going to be doing a takeover on Skinfix‘s Instagram next week and I cannot wait!!!! Check them out at Target, and if you try it, let me know your thoughts!

ALSO… THE BOOK — Have you read it? Have you received it in the mail? Have you seen it in your local B&N?

Yesterday I was just doing my usual Monday morning thing: sitting on my couch, responding to emails, sipping on some iced cold brew coffee, petting Huddy… And I get a text from a friend saying, “Your book comes out in 6 days!!!!”

I wasn’t surprised by his saying that– the release date of my book has changed around quite a bit and I can’t expect everyone in my life to know that November 15th has been the official date for the last several months. Plus, at this point, since it’s been available for preorder since May, I am beyond used to people thinking that it’s already out and available to read.

But this particular person doesn’t really throw around statements he’s not positive are correct, so after reading his text I checked my Amazon book page for the hell of it. And when I checked, sure enough it said release date: NOVEMBER 1ST. Otherwise known as six days from yesterday. Otherwise known as THIS SUNDAY.

ExCuuuUuuSeee Me?!?!?!

I know the 1st and the 15th of November may not seem all that far apart from each other in the grand scheme of things, but when you’ve been waiting for your own book to hit shelves since you finished writing in in February — a two week difference is a damn huge one. That means I only have to wait one week instead of three to share Breaking Vegan with you guys… Especially those of you who have preordered. (Which, by the way, THANK YOU for that times a million.)

I don’t know if it’s more exciting that the book will be OUT and that you guys can read the story once and for all (YAY!) or that when people ask me when my book is coming out, I can say that it’s OUT. I don’t have to give the whole, “Oh, it comes out mid November, but go ahead and preorder it if you’re interested…” which, let’s be honest, 95% of people just don’t do. It’s hard enough to get people to commit to buying a book and then reading it, let alone to preordering it months before it comes out!!!!

Every day someone in my life says, “Ah! I am so sorry, I am the WORST friend but I haven’t read your book yet. Where can I get it?!?!?” And I tell them they aren’t the worst friend at all because the book isn’t even OUT yet. When I post photos of the cover on social media, etc. I know it totally gives the impression to most Internet-scrollers that it’s out, butttttt as of now — not yet.

I AM SO EXCITED for the book to launch, and I am DOUBLE EXCITED that Well & Good NYC shared the first ever before seen EXCERPT of the book on their site yesterday!!! I have been so appreciative of everyone’s feedback and support, and it’s so fun having a little slice of the book on the Internet that I figured I would share a few little paragraphs with you guys here:

This is from the chapter No One Plans to Develop an Eating Disorder, which is the 3rd chapter in the book.

No One Plans to Develop an Eating Disorder…

“Right after the initial plant-based cleanse and my decision to start eating vegan, I took a road trip from Sacramento to LA with my best friend Jillian to start our last semester of college. When we stopped to get gas on our way out of town, Jill looked me up and down and said, “Holy shit, Jo! I have never seen you this tiny!” Of course I played it off like I barely knew what she was talking about (“Who, me?!”), but inside I was glowing because I knew that my outer frame reflected the mind-body connection I was developing with my plant-based diet.

The drive is six hours long, so midway through we stopped to get something to eat. Jillian got orange chicken and vegetable fried rice from a Chinese takeout place—yes, I’m that creepy friend who remembers people’s orders verbatim years later—while I cracked open my leftover butternut squash soup from the cleanse and ate a few big spoonfuls until I felt satisfied. I remember the look on her face that very clearly read, “That’s all you’re going to eat?” and then her many attempts to get me to try a bite of her deep-fried chicken. It was a no-go.

We chatted the drive away about life, the wild New Year’s Eve we’d just had in San Francisco, and how panicked I was to run into my now ex-boyfriend once the semester started back up. We were planning to go to a pajama-themed party that evening and decided that when we got back into town, we would go shopping for cute matching pajamas. (Jillian ended up swapping her pajamas with my friend Sarah at the party.) I wanted to have some kind of plant-based snack beforehand because the soup barely sustained me for more than an hour, but I didn’t have any snacks with me and it made more sense to drive straight to the mall. I told myself it was fine—I could embrace the empty feeling, as I’d done many times before.”

Head over to Well & Good to read the rest, and head to THIS LINKKKKK to preorder the booky book!!! Would be so, so, soooOooOoOOoOOoOOOOOO (can you tell I’m excited?) beyond appreciative of your continued support.

Sending you all so much love! Exciting tiiiiimes!!!! Also found out I am going to NYC next week for a super fun SELF magazine photo shoot that I kinda sorta can’t wait for…. See you east coasters REAL soon.  

Some of the books came in the mail yesterday and the rest are arriving today… Meaning that people like my MOM, my BEST FRIENDS, my SISTER, my BROTHER IN LAW, my BOOK PHOTOGRAPHER (slash good friend Ty Ty), and my AGENT (oh, and ME!) are reading it for the very, very first time. Well, my agent saw it through the whole process, but my family and friends hadn’t read one single word of the book until some of them received it yesterday. I have kept nearly everything about it a huge secret to them, and it is astoundingly thrilling to think that they are able to see it now and read what I’ve been working on for the last year and a half.

EEK!!!!! The book on my sister’s counter!! UNREAL VISION.

So, this is where you guys come in. With only a month and a half until the release of the book, preorders are SUUUUPERRR important. Some of the big outlets & book stores are placing their orders this week and next, and their orders ALL depend on the amount of preorders that are received. Plus, a preordered book is about $6.00 less than it will be when the book is actually out in November. Save yourself a few bucks, be one of the first to get it in your hands, ensure that you get one before it (maybe) goes into backorder, and help a sista out who is wildly excited to share her book/baby with the world!!!

This has to be said: I would not be here, at ALL, without you guys. If you didn’t read my blog, support my story, value the messages of balance/wellness/nutrition/authenticity/taking care of ourselves/finding HAPPINESS in our bodies and lives, then there is no way I would have had the opportunity to write this book and get it published. Massive thanks to those of you who have been along for the ride with me, and to those of you who are just finding this blog now, ALL of you who made your way to this little corner of the web: THANK YOU.

Thanks for helping make my dreams come true– and I will keep on making it my mission to bring you guys content that you love and answer as many questions and get to as many topics as I can for this bloggy for FREEE (duh) so that when you do support me by buying my book it’s like an investment in tons of free content on top of it, hehe.

To thank you all for your immense support, I am hosting a giveaway for people who send me their preorder receipts. (Just email them to me at thebalancedblonde@gmail.com)!!!

G I V E A W A Y !!! For TWOOOOO lucky winners, whom I will choose on Friday afternoon!

I am giving away 2 TBV APPAREL TEES of your choice. Check out the line here!!!!

1 CASE OF SUJA JUICE

2 BOXES OF LIQUID IV healthy hydration supplement!

1 JAR OF PHILOSOPHIE CACAO COCONUT BUTTER + 1 JAR OF PHILOSOPHIE MANUKA HONEY (….otherwise known as, the healthy version of crack cocaine.)

To enter, all you need to do is PREORDER the book here & email me your receipt!!!! So grateful. So stoked for all of you to read this. Like beyond stoked. Never been so excited about something in my lifetime.

ALSO!!!! The book is #1 in the Eating Disorder Self-Help category on Amazon right now! If it stays there until Friday, I will release a recipe photo and recipe from the book on the bloggy along with the winning names!! Woooo!!!

XOXOXO

Jordan

Here are the places you can preorder from:

 Amazon: Here

  Barnes & Noble: Here

  Indie Bound: Here

  Indigo Books: Here

   Bookish: Here

Even though this particular contest is now closed (woo, woo, 10 amazing winners), you will still all receive the free healthy recipe eBook that comes with preordering the book. So if you haven’t preordered, get on it!!! A lot of people have been asking me why preorders are important, with the book coming out in November and the preorders being available now. So I want to take a sec to explain because trust me before I went through this process on the author side, I had never preordered a book months in advance in my entire life. (Except for Chocolate Covered Katie‘s book, because I was WAY too excited for that one.)

Here’s why preorders are a thing…

When a book does well in preorders, different outlets like Amazon & Barnes and Noble & Indie Bound, etc. will base THEIR order number off of the preorders. If it only does moderately well, they’ll only buy a moderate amount of copies. If it does really well, they will buy more copies. The more copies they buy, the more likely the book is to do really well and get into more people’s hands. I can explain this all to you guys without sending like a sales-psycho because you are my readers/supporters, and you know that this book is MY LIFE and basically what I’ve always dreamed of.

Meanwhile, I totally get that preordering a book months in advance is something a lot of us don’t do. (I usually just wait for the book to come out.) But now, seeing how things go on the publishing side of things, I realize how important it is to get preorders in order to get eyes on the book. That’s why I am offering fun giveaways, the free recipe eBook, SIGNED book plates (!!!!), and the opportunity for Skype seshes for people who preorder & send me their purchase receipt.

Plus, the book is $5.00 cheaper in this preorder period!!! 

So there is my little explanation, so it can make sense as to why I want you guys to get your orders in before the book launches. LOVE YOU ALL and if you don’t want to preorder the book, that is more than okay. (OBVI!!)

I am still finishing the eBook — 7 recipes out of 10, down — because I didn’t anticipate my summer to be so INSANE and I also like to take my time with this stuff to bring you guys all of the best recipes, photos & writing content as possible. It should be really in the next couple of weeks, and if you email me your purchase receipt of the book then the eBook will come STRAIGHT to your inbox right when it is finished!

OH ALSO! Who wants to see an exclusive recipe from the book released in the next week or so? If there is interest for that… I am so doing it. I cannot WAIT to share these photos + recipes with you!

And now, without further ado…

Breaking Vegan Preorder Giveaway WINNNAASSS:

GRAND PRIZE (More than $550 total in product!): A pair of Lululemon pants, a NutriBullet blender, a 16-pack of Pitaya Plus packets, a case of Bai antioxidant infusion, a jar of Justin’s maple almond butter, Justin’s dark peanut butter cups, 1 box of Peanut Butter RxBars, a bottle of VEEV VitaFrute (organic vodka), a box of Nourish Snacks, a CaliScrub facial scrub, a large bag of Philosophie Superfoods Green Dream powder, prAna E.C.O Yoga Mat, Bison Bacon Cranberry EPIC Bars & Sample Pack of EPIC Bites, 1 large tub of VEGA Protein Powder, 1 TBV Apparel tee of your choice, a box of Liquid IV healthy hydration supplement

WINNER: Erin Hinkle, a.k.a one of my dear TBB readers & supporters, one of my main Snapchat friends, & a beautiful soul inside & out. Erin posts about the book on Instagram every so often & shows major support, which is not lost on me, EVER. So excited for you to receive your goodies, Erin!

Prize #2 + #3 (Same Prize Items for each): A NutriBullet blender, a 16-pack of Pitaya Plus packets, a case of Bai antioxidant infusion, a jar of Justin’s maple almond butter, Justin’s peanut butter cups, 1 box of Coconut RxBars, a 4-pack of Clean Energy RUNA tea, a bottle of VEEV VitaFrute (organic vodka), a box of Nourish Snacks, a CaliScrub facial scrub, a small bag of Philosophie Superfoods (flavor of your choice), prAna E.C.O Yoga Mat, 4 most popular EPIC bars + a bag of EPIC bites, 1 large tub of Vega Protein Powder, 1 TBV Apparel tee of your choice, a box of Liquid IV healthy hydration supplement

WINNERS: Sophia Van Doren & Paulina Casey, two super sweet souls who make their support of this project (and this blog!) clear. I had the fabulous pleasure of meeting Sophia at my Juice Press event in NYC over a year ago, and her wonderfully kind demeanor has stuck with me. Paulina, I hope I get to meet you one of these days, too!!! (MAYBE ON THE BOOK TOUR?!?!?)

Prize #4: “A LuluLemon Experience With Jordan” (So fun!!) — The opportunity to come into the Brentwood, Los Angeles Lululemon store and try on the latest and greatest Lulu trends! Jordan (me) will hang with you and help you decide what to get, and you will go home with a brand new free outfit! Killer prize, in my opinion. Plus a prAna E.C.O Yoga Mat!

WINNERS: Stacey Oswald, a.k.a Cupcakes & Kale Shakes, a.k.a the lovely girl with SO many small world coincidences — I emailed her back one morning and then RAN into her at Live Beaming, her new place of work!!! Stacey, we are gonna have a BLAST picking out an outfit for you at the Brentwood Lululemon!!!!

Prize #5: A Lovin’ Summer beach tent — basically the coolest thing around, and it’s 99% UV protective. If you live by the beach or are going on a beach vacation this summer… This is your prize.

WINNER: Zoe Howard, my babe of all babes. There was NOOOO one better to give this prize to, because A) we fell in love under the Costa Rican sun (Zoe came to COSTA RICAAAAA on a yoga retreat with me on April after reading about it on the bloggy!), B) You live in HAWAIII and you are a beach dweller, C) I want to protect that gorgeously glowing skin of yours, D) your support means the world to me… More than you know, and your kind words, emails, texts and comments stick with me for WEEKS after I read them. You have given me so much joy in these short few months since I’ve known you… So I want to gift ya back GF!!! MUAH.

Prize #6 + #7: The Beauty Basket! A pack of Sunology sunscreen, a case of Cate McNabb Cosmetics & Hello Hair product

WINNERS: Stephanie Layne & Macey Shinpaugh, because you both sent me wonderful emails along with your preorder receipts & because this beauty basket is one of my FAV prizes, and I hope you gals enjoy. <3 <3 

Prize #8 + #9: The Hydration Basket! VEEV VitaFrute organic vodka + mason jar, a case of Bai antioxidant infusion drink, DRINKmaple 12-bottle case of maple hydration beverage (so yummy), case of RUNA tea, Liquid IV healthy hydration supplement

WINNERS: Laura Jackson & Jamie Tingey, because the support I’ve gotten from these girls over the years of having this bloggy has radiated from the screen, and I adore them both and all of the words we’ve exchanged. I had the pleasure of meeting Jamie at mine & Sophie’s Equinox event last summer… and she is utterly lovely! I hope you girls LOVE your prizes. Muah, muah, muah.

NOT TO MENTIIOOONNNN, the SKYPE WINNERS! I know I told you all I would email you to choose a Skype time, oh, about TWO months ago, but now that I am finally back in LA & settling into my new apartment, now is the perfect time and I can decide my full self to chatting with you guys and getting to know you. You Skype winners, you know who you are already — I will be emailing you with details & time slot options this week! 

P.S. A few book-related things to get excited about…

Q&A’s on the bloggy WITH:

– Steven Bratman, the doctor who coined the term orthorexia, AND the amazing writer who wrote the FOREWORD of my book.

– Emily Nolan, the KILLLERRRR founder of My Kind of Life & Women Empowerment Event #TOPLESS. Emily wrote a blurb for the book that’s on the back cover. :))))

– Chocolate Covered Katie, who needs no intro because she’s THAT AWESOME, because she wrote a fabulous blurb for the back cover of the book & I am so honored and touched.

– Annie Lawless, BFF + writer of one of the fab blurbs in the book. (And the founder of SUJA and a best-selling author… come on…)

– Kathryn Budig, Lori Majewski, Alex Jamieson, Kelsey Miller & Deliciously Ella…. All FABBBBB writers of blurbies for the book